The Definition of Effort

The Stanford Cardinal Basketball Team recently won the NIT basketball tournament. This accomplishment cementing their legacy as the 69th best basketball in the NCAA in 2012. The unceremonious accolade came with a much bigger prize! My friend Steve shared a pre-game speech they were given by the Great Ray Lewis. Mr. Lewis is one of the greatest Linebackers in the history of professional football. He is also a physical beast and a person who many consider to be a complete maniac. So, what can a fire breathing physical mad man from the mean streets of Lakeland Florida teach a team of well-to-do student athletes.....a lot, it turns out!

Mr. Lewis makes a variety of points in this 2 minute rampage of inspiration. The 3 most prominent in my mind:
"If tomorrow wasn't promised what would you give for today"
"Legacy is found through effort"
"Every moment is a new moment"

No Sunlight Left
Ray Lewis poses the question: If there was no tomorrow would you worry about yourself or the person sitting next to you. Fear might insist that on our last day on earth we would act with cowardice....but I doubt it! I would like to believe that people would want to share their fleeting hours with their loved ones...and to tell them how much they cared.

What if tomorrow wasn't promised?

Do you have the job you genuinely want? Are you with a person who makes you better in every moment? Do you treat people around you with respect? Are you focused on the right things? Does money matter more to you than the people who exchange it? Are you a Hero?

NOW is the time to start pondering these questions. Tomorrow is not promised!

Effort is Everything!
We often approach life in shoulds. "Should I take the job for which I am over-qualified and perform extremely well or should I take the job for which I am under-qualified and risk failure?". I hearken back to my college days.....I posed a similar question to my career counselor, her response......Take the job for which you are under-qualified and perform extremely well.

Dam Right!

Greatness has a simple definition: You know you are the most talented person on the team and you still put in more effort than anyone else.

It is easy to be talented and to give just enough effort. It is not so easy to show up early and to stay late. Combining the aforementioned virtues means you are working harder and smarter. There are no shoulds in this scenario, it is the difference between greatness and mediocrity. Ray Lewis reminds us that no one is OK with being basic.

Pissed Off for Greatness
You are a different creature now than you were 5 minutes ago. That truth is difficult to embrace. You have a plan to follow: get the finances in order, find a girl, buy a house, raise some children, get that corner office. While the end game in that might seem boring it takes a special creature to achieve such things. Every day there is struggle! The first step in conquering your goals is confronting what is difficult and making it less so. It is simply a matter of having the will to try, the courage to risk failure, and the ability to find a door where others see a dead end.

It doesn't matter if you are a middle-aged business contributor, you can still compete like a college basketball player. You don't have to be an entrepreneur to have original ideas and to utilize them in your work. Every day is an opportunity to redefine yourself.

Are You Pissed Off for Greatness?

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave 

Manifesto

I was intrigued by a recent Inc Magazine feature that introduced me to the Holstee Manifesto. Holstee is a clothing company based in Brooklyn, NY. Their products and services are not the story. In recent years companies like Zappos and TOMS have emerged as attractive companies for whom to work. Not because they sell shoes but because they have created extraordinary company cultures. Zappos' in-office parades brought exposure to their company culture. TOMS devotion to philanthropy inspired millions. In Holstee's case, their organizational exposure was created by a well written manifesto. It inspired me to write my own....enjoy!

When you were 12 did you have a plan to be who you are today? If not, is there something you can do to change your path? Are your dreams your own? What would it take to get you to the part in the movie where everything changes? It is not enough to talk under your breath, you have to dream big and act! Positivity involves a type of thinking that is actionable. It is much easier to criticize while others take action. You will never regret putting yourself out there. You cannot pretend you do not want more. There is never an ideal time to do anything. You have to will yourself to the impossible and make it the new standard. Everyone will celebrate when you reach the mountain top, but the climb is your own. We are all prisoners to the qualification of possible that has been set before us by people who care less than we do. It is hard to erase the line and paint it in a new spot. There are millions of people in the stands with their arms folded and only a few on the field. The privilege of excellence starts with volunteerism. You have to be willing to fall down in front of a whole bunch of people. You have to be willing to take the field with your head up. No achievement has ever come from passive observance. This is your invitation to change everything. Those whose head's are on Mt. Rushmore were willing to fall on their face. Most people will pass on their opportunity, others will never even see it coming...and the very few will decide to be Heroes by the very practice of trying. Your dreams are readily available. Everything you always wanted is yours. Your greatest opposition is yourself and that opponent is consistently surprised when you push back.

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Two Things Necessary

We have entered a new year and resolutions abound. It's a time when people reflect on the year past and set goals for the upcoming 365 days. The nostalgia of the holidays has worn off, the success of the year before is buried in the history books and we are charged with putting a new plan in place. Goal setting usually runs in tandem with "what could I have done better". We think back, grind our teeth and forget our victories.

Our path to success is limited to the time we have on this planet and how we choose to spend it.

Setting goals is a simple process....differentiate what you want to do from what you have to do, and prioritize accordingly.

Last year I saw presentations by Tony Hsieh and Google's Compensation Team. Walking out of both presentations people told me directly - My company will never be like Google (Zappos). They missed the point. Tony Hsieh would not spend time away from his company if he didn't believe in his personal mission of delivering happiness. Google would not take their employees out of the workplace if they didn't feel that sharing their model for success would benefit the marketplace.

It comes down to 2 things: Alignment and Adoption

In considering your goals for 2012, ask yourself the following.....

Are your professional goals aligned with your personal purpose?


Do you have a strategy to have your ideas adopted?

Alignment
Zappos has become the model for developing organizational culture. But, you don't need to have parades or weird employees to have an extraordinary company culture. All you need is established core values that align with your business critical goals (and employees who believe in said values).

For several years I have been in search of the true definition of Employee Engagement. The one central truth I have discovered is that no 2 companies are the same....so there is no all-encompassing definition of the aforementioned catch phrase. The best proposed definition I have heard for Employee Engagement?:

Core Values that are aligned with departmental goals

What are your personal core values? Are they aligned with your metrics for achieving success?

Your goal setting for 2012 should start with a long walk. On your journey ask questions of yourself to discover if you are on the right path. If everything that drives you is an expectation of someone else....you are mislead. You have to consider your genuine purpose on this earth and how that influences your work. I am not suggesting that you quit your job and work on a fishing boat in Alaska...I am suggesting that you make your cubicle your fishing boat.

You are the only person on earth who truly knows what you genuinely love (and what you could do without). No one has to know what drives YOU but yourself. Find your fishing boat and let it guide you through the storm.

Adoption
When I was a young man, I opposed almost every directive that was given me by my boss. At one point, he asked me if I had a better idea....? I used to run to my general manager to ask him for special pricing for a client. He consistently asked me for numbers to back up my request for a discount. I was swinging at shadows; unprepared to make change but vocal about what wasn't working.

You have to have a strategy for adoption!

Sit down with a CEO without a distinct plan and data to back it up and you will be thrown out a boardroom window. Ask a client to meet you, show up with a blank pad, and you have lost an opportunity forever. Don't waste people's time by asking them to prepare for you.

The aforementioned Google presentation outlined a 6 point plan for gaining Executive approval. The people who overlooked this strategy for adoption mired by the Google logo don't work at Google for a reason.

Whether you are meeting a client, reviewing strategy with your boss, or choosing a movie with your wife; you have to have a strategy.

At the very least:
* Gather information from the trenches
* Quantify and Qualify the information you gather in the trenches
* Speak with your audiences tongue
* Tell them something they have never heard before

So there you have it. 2 simple things you need to make 2012 (and the rest of your life) a raging success!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Time To Live

I remember hearing that people die in 3's. Death seems to come in greater numbers in recent days. The loss of Steve Jobs, Al Davis, and Joe Frazier upset me. As people pass through this world we hear recollections of their time here: all lives well-served, legacies intact. That is the wish any of us strive to fulfill - time well served and a few people to carry on our legacy.

In reading the eulogy to Steve Jobs, I renewed my mission on earth: to never be distracted by detail, to Love and let those I Love know as much, to be loyal, to be honorable, to be accountable, to be humble...and to lift up those around me.

I appreciated hearing of the true devotion Steve Jobs had to his family despite his fierce pursuit of professional perfection. I know Al Davis helped a lot of people despite his reputation. Joe Frazier remained a loyal friend to Muhammad Ali despite the public embarrassment "the champ" caused him. All men of great achievement with the self-awareness that they were not bigger than the least of their counter-parts. A trait to be mindful of.

In 1998, Mark Oliver Everett wrote an album in tribute to his father, sister and mother...all of whom had departed the world. The album concluded, with the phrase:
"I was thinking about how everyone is dying, and maybe it's time to live"

In my moments of most profound reflection, tears come to me without being released. I think of my sweetie and how every day I work to earn her love...I will never be worthy. I think of my son and how profoundly proud I am to have him carry my name long after I am gone. I think of my daughter sitting in the tree house of my heart. I conclude to live every day as if it were my last.

Precious moments with the ones we love never pan out as we might propose in our time of profound reflection. We hurt the people we love. We neglect our energy to do the extra things, say things we do not mean, and make selfish choices. But, when the final curtain comes down I doubt we will remember our selfish moments. I would like to think that we will ascend into light surrounded by those we love. And proclaim our amazement with it all, as Steve Jobs did. Until then, it's a good idea to maximize every second for everything that it is worth. Better to realize that now than to wait for the final curtain.

Celebrate your imperfection. Be good to one another. Treasure Everything!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Life's Unfair Balance

There is a lot of doom and gloom these days....struggling economy, protests, political muck raking, less than entertaining sporting events, over priced nights on the town. It seems the work day requires us to do more with less and when we try to break free our bank accounts are emptied. Not exactly a fair way of living: bust your butt, earn a few bucks and spend them all releasing stress....a steep price to pay for a headache.

If we are able to admit we may have to work harder than ever to earn less (and be OK with that) we might be on to something revolutionary! Life isn't fair, times are tough, and our only certainties are death and taxes. The landscape may not change any time soon. So you can sit at the bottom of the hill and cry or you can strap your boots on and start climbing the mountain.

With every task there is another, there are thousands waiting to fill your job, and you feel tied to the whipping post. The choice is pretty simple: get busy living, or get busy dying. Your Perception and your Attitude navigate your destiny.

In this time of uncertainty the following things remain indiscernibly true:
Hard Work Pays Off!
The 5 Best Words in the Human Language
Take a Breath

An Inarguable Truth
We are all looking for that idea, stock option, or widget that will catapult our wealth. There is only one sure answer: Hard Work! No matter what you do, if you grind it out for long hard hours, you will succeed! You can always work harder, you can always do more, your true potential is almost impossible to realize. It may take a month or a year or five years....but if you stick to it with unflappable determination: You Will Win!

Things that are out of your control may derail your progress. Someone may play dirty to take that promotion you wanted. There will be times when you trust the wrong person. Sometimes you take a chance and fail. Allow nothing to discourage you! If you keep working hard, success is eminent!

5 Words We All Want to Hear
I once worked for a person who saw my truest potential and pushed me every day to discover it. She liked me immensely but she would never let me know it. She felt responsible for my success and she would not allow me to under perform for even one day. When I finished at the top of the revenue report she met me at the bar at our awards banquet, put her hand on my shoulder and said....

I Am Proud Of You!

...I nearly cried. Those 5 words made 365 days of total effort completely worth it. Some employees want more money, others want gifts or travel vouchers, and there are those who like trophies. But, everyone wants to be told they have honored their post with the fullest of integrity!

Who Cares
I am a hyper-focused professional. I take advantage of every opportunity to improve and I take my work personally. Those who do less than I, and pass judgement, make me insane!

I once asked a really good friend (professional musician) to hear me out on an interpersonal struggle I was having at work. I explained the situation to her and she replied:
Who Cares.........!!!!!

Usually that reply would drive me nuts but in this case it made perfect sense. I was so focused on the mundane detail of a completely irrelevant point that I lost my focus of what was important. It was a shocking revelation. We often fret over things that are completely meaningless. In fact, most of the things that cause stress do nothing more than distract us from our actual goal. Sometimes you have to take a breath, blow it off and move on!

Week in and week out we learn that we often neglect what is important. We lose time with our children because we are pre-occupied trying to please someone at work. We are distracted at dinner with a loved one because our head is in our BlackBerry. We forget to tell Mom we love her...and then she is gone!

Time is fleeting, use it wisely! Nothing is too important!

Don't Forget to Remember!

- Dave

YES

Many years ago a young man walked into an art exhibit. Curious of his environment and the motives of the attendees he looked around with eyebrow raised. He came upon a ladder that lead to the portal of sorts. He wondered what might be at the other end of the portal. Before taking action he weighted the potential of putting effort into the climb if only to witness something unfulfilling. Sure of frustration, he climbed the ladder. A microscope hung from the ceiling, he grabbed it, and discovered one perfect word:
YES

He found himself caught up in emotion. Validated and empowered by what he saw. Ashamed that he nearly allowed his judgement to deny him the experience. The young man's name was John Lennon. The power of the artistic exercise the means for introduction to his future wife. He could have considered the reward unworthy of his effort before experiencing it and walked away.

We may have missed our other in this world simply because our intuition told us our time was better spent. Then walked off to spend time doing something far less productive. This is an unfortunate aside to our existence. We want proof before we act. Our faith has been replaced by the need for factual assessment. By these measures many of us never try new things and remain unfulfilled.

Everyone wants to be great! We want a job promotion, we want to experience lands far away, we want to ask the girl to dance...but we avoid taking the chance for fear of rejection, embarrassment, or the potential frustration of time wasted. We allow NO to regulate us instead of saying YES and taking control of our immeasurable power.

It's time to take the power back. Turn that corner to see what's on the other side. If nothing else, we could try a little optimism.

When you open the door to tomorrow, think of what's possible...don't allow your fear of the worst to restrict your actions. Seek opportunity. Meet new people, volunteer, apply for a promotion.

Climb the Ladder....because you can!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Easy is Nothing

I have been reading Start With Why by Simon Sinek and have enjoyed the book immensely. Among other great concepts, Simon introduces the difference between Manipulation and Inspiration.
It seems to be common place in the working world that we believe the way to motivate people is through manipulation (carrot and stick). There has been an onslaught of criticism of Generation Y and their unwillingness to conform, yet we keep the carrots and stick at hand. In essence, we know that manipulation is an inelegant approach but we continue the practice. I interviewed Dan Pink a few weeks back and asked why he thought defacto training was replacing education in the workplace. He noted that it was easier and we tend toward the simpler solution.

So there we have it: trade the practice of changing lives in the workplace for a safe and uninventive process. 

Purpose driven companies are acutely aware of their differentiators and use them as their Primary Organizational Mission.

Unfortunately, purpose driven companies are few and far between. At some point, inspiring people in the workplace became too risky. You have to monitor what you say, ask only of your employees what seems reasonable, measure performance by job description...do the safe thing, leave well enough alone and wallow in mediocrity. It's easier that way.

Zappos have created a model for company culture. People are now saying, "we have embraced the Zappos model".....No, you haven't! We are so hung up on manipulation that we are in denial of our inability to inspire. Zappos makes a daily practice of doing the hard thing. This is why their culture is great. They empower employees, put themselves on the social media edge, use 'above and beyond' customer service as their SOP, allow the personal aspects of their team to drive their company brand, and always think a step ahead. Unless you have enough balls to practice the aforementioned engagement mission, don't pretend you have embraced the Zappos model.

By starting with why, Simon Sinek has helped companies rediscover their genuine organizational purpose. They need not concern themselves with appeasing Generation Y or trying to be like Zappos. They simply need to know that people buy not what they do but why they do it.

Remove the dust from over the Core Values on your lobby wall. Remember what made your company great and continue to be great. There are no easy answers or defacto training...every day will be an inventive challenge. If you want to be a great company these are the things that you need to consider. Doesn't that sound easy?

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave    

Proof

I recently attended a Diversity Networking Forum. When I got there a man asked me, "so, why are you here?" As if to insinuate that I needed a preexisting condition to qualify my attendance. I was under the impression that the whole purpose of diversity was to dispel stereotypes...?

I recently heard an interview with a musician. He explained that science dispels magic. That scientists are able to put facts behind a myth and take the fun out of the fable. That no one believes in anything anymore. That we need proof before we can put our faith in anything.

Osama Bin Laden is dead at sea....fish out his body and bring it on a US Tour. We won't believe it until we put our fingers in his wounds.

It's kind of sad that we have become so mistrusting. It is a shame that we need undeniable proof to validate the use of our time. Show me the statistics and I will evaluate next steps with the committee of me.

Maybe there are 2 types of people:
Those who act in good faith
Those who cannot act without proof that their actions will produce results

Are results all that matter? If we only did things with the certainty that it would produce a winning formula would we experience anything new? Would we ever find a new frontier if we feared to travel there without a proven path through the forest?

Data has never been more accessible. So it is incumbent upon us to ensure we have all the facts before we act, right?

Wrong!

We are not robots. Not everything has to have a finite end game. Progress evades so many of us because we are afraid that the lack of proof would invalidate our effort. Our need to have evidence makes us normal, predictable...sad.


We all want to be great but sometimes we fail to recognize that greatness is a result of exploring the unproven. To act without evidence catapults us into the unknown. The exploring of the unknown is a process of education. Every time we try something unproven we get closer to creating something new.

Maybe the aforementioned musician was wrong. Maybe scientists create magic. Their quest being the creation of the magic formula not an effort to dispel our faith in the unknown.

There cannot be a question that trying something new is a wonderful waste of time. With each mistrial comes another door, another path in the woods, another chance to disprove what has been certified.

Without excitement we cannot thrive. Without the mystery of the unknown we cannot generate excitement.

The door is open.....

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Half Nelson

"Once You've Wrestled, Everything in Life is Easy"
- Dan Gable

This weekend, while my brackets were imploding, I turned my attention to the NCAA Wrestling Finals. Having spent a good part of my life in this sport, I can tell you that nothing is harder than wrestling. You use every muscle in your body for seven minutes, conditioning is crucial. Wrestlers also take on a strenuous dieting regiment. Winning a wrestling tournament means facing 3 to 6 opponents in a day ~ tired and under-nourished. There is nothing harder.

In High School just making the state wrestling tournament is a lifetime achievement. If you earn a spot on a college roster, you are among an elite group of top performers from across the world.

So you've conditioned and dieted. You've won a few tournaments as a youth. You best five people just to make a spot on the Varsity team. You wrestle 50 matches a year and need to win 90 percent of them to get a spot at the top of your weight class. The odds of competing at this level in High School are at least 1000 to 1. Once you get to college it is 50 times harder. Imagine the life long dedication of the people on the mat this weekend in Philadelphia. To have sacrificed many of the joys of youth to develop an extraordinary self-discipline. To train until you fall over and to get up and train some more.....then imagine doing this with just one leg?

Arizona State's Anthony Robles won the 125 pound National Championship with just one leg. Anthony was born with just one leg but his Mother never allowed him to think of himself as different. While dunking a basketball or running a 40 yard dash were not an option, wrestling was. So Mrs. Robles allowed her son to find his place in the world and now he has his place in the NCAA Record Book!

As I look back on my wrestling career, I remember wimping out on several occasions. Lacking the dietary discipline, skipping a work out to be with my girlfriend. When you are 16 these things are to be expected. As I have evolved into an adult the default of complaints still loom. I can always find a reason not to do something. Seeing Anthony Robles, conquer one of the world's toughest challenges with just one leg made me feel like a real wimp! How could I ever make an excuse knowing that Anthony is out there, competing at the highest level, without complaint.

There are 2 keys to Anthony's Success:
He Didn't Let Set Backs Define Him
He Found His Thing

1st Choice
Every day, we wake up and choose who to be. The traffic can annoy us. The inbox can intimidate us. A phone call can set us off course. Most of us have the ability to transcend all of that. We just choose not to.

Human Beings process over 10,000 thoughts a day and 80% of them are negative. Why do we choose to defeat ourselves? Anthony Robles, had the set back of being born with just one leg but the advantage of a positive attitude. Because his mother did not allow him to feel sorry for himself he developed an advantage over everyone else. He never developed the ability to complain.

2nd Choice
I once knew a guy who wanted to be a stand up comedian. The problem was he wasn't funny. He dedicated his life to the craft, he worked harder than anyone else in the business, but he didn't possess the essential skill of the craft. If you are not funny, you simply cannot be a comedian.

Most of us are miscast. We choose a career in finance because we are good at math or go into the family business by default. That's why 80% of our thoughts are negative because we are doing things we don't want to do. We cripple ourselves by making safe career choices without considering our passion.

I have been blessed with the competing skill sets of creativity and fierce determination. I have found a career that allows me to celebrate both traits. For this, I consider myself a success. Most people are not lucky enough to have a job that celebrates their strengths. Most people accept a job, they don't create a career. Most people are unhappy because they choose to be.

Anthony Robles had to make a decision based on his limitations and now he's a National Champion.

You don't have to do anything. So why wouldn't you do what you want!

Stop making excuses and start making choices!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

3 Trends to Sunset in 2011

The great Paul Hebert wrote a piece for Fistful of Talent that touched on the metric validation most organizations seem to seek in programming. His point was not lost on me. I have seen an influx of organizations seeking buzz words and statistical proof to frame new directives. Paul's extended point being that there is not a score that can address the level of engagement in a corporate culture and that there is no 'end game' in assessing Employee Engagement.

Too often organizations seek statistics to validate employee's shelf life or pull in a 'vendor' to formulate a program upon whom to blame failed engagement. Is there a less flattering term than 'vendor'?

Great companies love their people, unconditionally, every day. Great companies find an honest approach to forming business partnerships and honor their 'vendors' in the same respect that they do their employees. Organizational culture starts with an Executive vision, extends through your Linchpin employees and further to the fantastic professionals that represent you as business partners (not vendors).

We have lost our ability to cultivate and grow unique and meaningful human motivation. We have taken the people out of the equation and made it about numbers....shame on us.

In furtherance to Paul Hebert's blog post and the great minds of Keith Ferrazzi, Tony Hsieh, Seth Godin, Chris Guillebeau and Dan Pink....I am going to issue a challenge to the world:
Stop looking for statistics to marginalize thought leadership (or lack there of)
Stop looking for the next catch phrase to fuel white paper and webinar dribble

There are 3 trends that I would like to see sunset in 2011:
Generational Generalization
The request for ROI
Transparent Insecurity

X, Y, Boomer
The Millennials are taking over the workplace, the Baby Boomers are retiring. We get it: different generations have different forms of education, training and resource access. Regardless of our date of birth, We are not babies. Quit trying to simplify the organizational vision 'in terms we can understand'.

How do you think your Gen Y employees feel when you publish marketing materials that categorize them as complacent?
How do you think Baby Boomers feel when you invalidate their existence?

Here's the big picture: There are 90 year old people who are wizards on an I-pad and 22 year old people that do not use Facebook.

When a 'new' worker comes into a company an elder statesman or woman pulls him/her aside and tells them 'how it is around here'. The 'new' person dismisses the elder statesman or woman as insecure and shoots for their sales record. At a certain point the 'new' person begins to assert themselves and the elder statesman or woman dismisses them as a loud mouth without a proven track record. It's exhausting...and there in lies my point!

Return Our Investment
ROI is the talk of the town. Show me the money. Show me how my competitors have used your services and how they have profited accordingly. I want a formula to show to my boss to defend my decision in case the 'vendor' turns out to be bad at what they do.

Are we not beyond the point of needing a reciept to validate our decisions? Can we not watch 3 acts on American Idol and decide whose record we would buy? Can we not judge human character rather than crunching numbers.....?

Trust Fuels Partnerships!

The request for an ROI formula enhances BS, it does not dissolve it!

A diatribe in Defense of what I'm about to say....
Test your client's company culture. Make an inquiry. If you get a 2 paragraph diatribe...the culture is broken.

The 'struggling economy' (another tired term) has prompted Managers to beat their employees into submission. It is no longer OK to say, 'I screwed up'. You have to explain every detail of the thought process and every other person who touched the product....Micro-Management driven by negative consequence creates a culture of fear and paranoia. Motivation is replaced by indecision, blame passing and the unexplainable need to explain one's every action. Employees are forced to beg forgiveness before they act....It's Exhausting and there in continues my point!

We Have To Get Better!

4 wishes for 2011:
1. Dissolve catch phrases that marginalize our behavior
2. Stop simplifying employees existence by categorizing by generation
3. ROI formulas are BS...build trusting relationships instead
4. Dispel transparent insecurity by trusting your employees to make decisions

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

The Transparency of Insecurity

I met an old friend for coffee this week. The only word I got in edgewise was, "How are you?". My invitation to converse was followed by an hour long tirade. This once strong professional had lost his confidence and was blaming everyone in sight for his failures. He is an amazingly smart guy who channelled business relevant challenges and articulated humor through his complaints. It all fell on deaf ears. The bravado of his negativity dwarfed his business intelligence. I can't imagine that anyone would take this Gentleman seriously and that is a serious shame.

After our conversation I almost cried for this guy. I consider myself very good at helping people find the recourse of their perception and attitude. I didn't make a dent with my old friend:
It Is Hard To Give Up On People

What hurt most about this conversation is that I used to be this guy:
Consumed by Negativity
Totally Unaccountable
Mired in Bravado

Yes...Mr Positivity used to be Mr Miserable. I regret the hours I wasted with the friends that afforded me their audience. I hope my friend can bring himself to realize the faults of his presentation at some point in his life. The transition I went through was a costly one. I allowed the negativity and mislead actions of others to distract me from my genuine intent. I lost focus on my job, spilled negativity into the lives of my friends and was unable to focus on my family. I allowed people without my best intent in mind to win my attention and to overwhelm me. What a waste.

Where do you direct your time & energy? Do you allow mundane detail to distract from your larger goals?

I received 2 important pieces of advice that helped me make a life transition and I want to share them with you:
Self Promotion is Not the Way to Win Favor
Insecurity is Transparent

Hire Me, I'm Great!
I was half way through an interview, rolling through my resume, pounding my chest. After my diatribe, I asked if I had answered the interviewers question to which he replied...."this is not a matter of you proving yourself to me, it is a matter of us deciding if this is a career for you".

I sat back in my chair and settled into an hour long relaxed conversation. A great dialogue. A revealing of my true self. I got the job!

Don't Go Gettin' Insecure
My first ride along with my new boss, our first appointment together...cancelled. I was hell bent on proving my worth and was not afforded the chance. I got back in my car deflated and told my boss of my discontent. He put his hand on my shoulder and said, "don't go gettin' insecure on me".

These conversations changed my life! I settled into MY plan. I have never tried to prove myself outside of my work since. I vowed to do my fighting in the ring. My transparent insecurity vanished, I became fun to be around again, I have never been more professionally productive, and I have never been more confident.

Have you taken a moment to listen to yourself? Are you aware of how others really perceive you?

We all go through transitions in our lives. My life got a million times better when I took ownership of everything! I stopped looking for anyone to carry my load, I stopped looking for recognition of my every effort, I kept my head down and I ignored that which was beyond my control!

I hope my friend finds a way to make this transition. I hope you do too!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Monday Motivation

It's Monday......

I remember a time in a my life when I dreaded this day. Not Any More!

I have made many changes in my life but my renewed joy for Monday is the result of two things:

PERCEPTION

ATTITUDE

My climb out of Monday Morning Misery has produced one undeniable truth:

If you think today will suck, it will!

I left my headphones off this morning and listened to a group of retirees complain for 1.5 hours: the economy, mislead young people, a directionless country and Toyota's inability.

Their day will suck...and it might stand to reason that 70 years of unlimited potential has been wasted on these human beings. At what point did they give up, at what point did they stop pursuing their dreams and become 'the victim', at what point did they stop living and start dieing?

The effort you put into negative thought does less for the mind than uplifting thought. Uplifting thought requires no more effort but produces results.

Nothing has Ever Been Achieved as the Result of a Complaint!

How will you spend today, this week, this year? What will you do with the results? If you keep frowning not only will you fail but you will fail alone.

TODAY IS THE DAY!

Let go of that which you cannot change and accept it!

Strive toward that which will ensure your happiness!

Use that which people most admire about YOU to differentiate YOU in the workplace!

It is as easy and as hard as that!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

references:

www.linkedin.com/in/davidkovacovich

http://twitter.com/davidkovacovich