Life's Unfair Balance

There is a lot of doom and gloom these days....struggling economy, protests, political muck raking, less than entertaining sporting events, over priced nights on the town. It seems the work day requires us to do more with less and when we try to break free our bank accounts are emptied. Not exactly a fair way of living: bust your butt, earn a few bucks and spend them all releasing stress....a steep price to pay for a headache.

If we are able to admit we may have to work harder than ever to earn less (and be OK with that) we might be on to something revolutionary! Life isn't fair, times are tough, and our only certainties are death and taxes. The landscape may not change any time soon. So you can sit at the bottom of the hill and cry or you can strap your boots on and start climbing the mountain.

With every task there is another, there are thousands waiting to fill your job, and you feel tied to the whipping post. The choice is pretty simple: get busy living, or get busy dying. Your Perception and your Attitude navigate your destiny.

In this time of uncertainty the following things remain indiscernibly true:
Hard Work Pays Off!
The 5 Best Words in the Human Language
Take a Breath

An Inarguable Truth
We are all looking for that idea, stock option, or widget that will catapult our wealth. There is only one sure answer: Hard Work! No matter what you do, if you grind it out for long hard hours, you will succeed! You can always work harder, you can always do more, your true potential is almost impossible to realize. It may take a month or a year or five years....but if you stick to it with unflappable determination: You Will Win!

Things that are out of your control may derail your progress. Someone may play dirty to take that promotion you wanted. There will be times when you trust the wrong person. Sometimes you take a chance and fail. Allow nothing to discourage you! If you keep working hard, success is eminent!

5 Words We All Want to Hear
I once worked for a person who saw my truest potential and pushed me every day to discover it. She liked me immensely but she would never let me know it. She felt responsible for my success and she would not allow me to under perform for even one day. When I finished at the top of the revenue report she met me at the bar at our awards banquet, put her hand on my shoulder and said....

I Am Proud Of You!

...I nearly cried. Those 5 words made 365 days of total effort completely worth it. Some employees want more money, others want gifts or travel vouchers, and there are those who like trophies. But, everyone wants to be told they have honored their post with the fullest of integrity!

Who Cares
I am a hyper-focused professional. I take advantage of every opportunity to improve and I take my work personally. Those who do less than I, and pass judgement, make me insane!

I once asked a really good friend (professional musician) to hear me out on an interpersonal struggle I was having at work. I explained the situation to her and she replied:
Who Cares.........!!!!!

Usually that reply would drive me nuts but in this case it made perfect sense. I was so focused on the mundane detail of a completely irrelevant point that I lost my focus of what was important. It was a shocking revelation. We often fret over things that are completely meaningless. In fact, most of the things that cause stress do nothing more than distract us from our actual goal. Sometimes you have to take a breath, blow it off and move on!

Week in and week out we learn that we often neglect what is important. We lose time with our children because we are pre-occupied trying to please someone at work. We are distracted at dinner with a loved one because our head is in our BlackBerry. We forget to tell Mom we love her...and then she is gone!

Time is fleeting, use it wisely! Nothing is too important!

Don't Forget to Remember!

- Dave

The All Star Game - Revisited

I composed this a year ago in tribute to my friend Frank Wolf, my lovely wife and to all the people I am happy to call my pals. Enjoy!

Last night's Major League Baseball All Star Game was thrilling! I will always love this game because I had a chance to experience the festivities a few years back in San Francisco.

The MLB All Star Game is preceded by the home run derby. If you get a thrill from mosh pits you must take in this event. My wife and I stood in the left field bleachers as Vladamir Guerrero launched hit after hit into our section. People spilled beer on one another, stood arm and arm on their seats, and eventually fell head first into concrete to grab a souvenir. After our section had stumbled over each other three or four homers in a row I stood on my seat and yelled freedom because the experience was so invigorating. I looked down at my wife and she was sitting in her seat crying (she stands 5ft and weighs 100 pounds). I grabbed her up on the seat with me and made her enjoy the madness....at some point I think she understood the chaos.

The day of the All Star Game I woke up, threw on my causal game going gear and boarded a train to my friend Frank Wolf's funeral. The excitement of the game mired in the tragic and untimely death of my true friend and a lover of life. Ryder Kuhl mad dogged me from his car seat as his dad picked me up from the train and we headed to the church. The harsh looks continued through the day as my Fred Perry and Vans were not in keeping with the exquisite dress of the occasion....Frank would have understood. As the pall bearers put Frank's body into the car that would take him to his final resting place, my friend Chris Clinch temporarily lost it. He was overcome by emotion and a feeling of loneliness having lost another close friend. My friend's unadulterated fear and sadness made me cry and I too felt completely alone...I wish I could have hugged him in that moment. Just as my fear grew Dave Lincoln appeared out of nowhere, put his hand on my shoulder and gave me a humble smile. I respected him tremendously for being kind enough to offer me his hand and for being respectful enough not the say anything in that moment. He guided me back to the car and I boarded the train back into San Francisco.

As I got off the train I wondered how I could bring myself celebrate after such a somber event. Immediately my wife rushed up to me and grabbed my hand as if we were headed into Disneyland. She escorted me to a private party where Counting Crows were playing by the Bay, bought a beer that was bigger than her head and trotted to the front row to dance the afternoon away. This effort was not in disrespect of her friend Frank but in tribute to him. The wise young lady helped me once again understand that as we transcend this place our memories are carried in celebration not pity. As I watched the love of my life dance I thought how fortunate I am to have the love of the family I have created, how much I regretted that Frank would not get the chance to experience such a thing and how grateful I was that he did not leave a wife or children behind. The music carried into the sunset, "these lines of lightening mean we're never alone."

The great Steve Fanelli got us perfect seats behind home plate. We heard applause for the misunderstood Barry Bonds and watched Ichiro Suzuki hit an inside the park home run. I looked into heaven to my friend Frank Wolf.

We walked back to our hotel to put our heads down before returning to the reality of parenting, work and life in the hustle.

I will never forget the cheers and songs I heard. Baseball gives us all hope. We see the strength in the mighty men on the field and it helps us feel strong: when the market slumps, when our relationships are challenged and when we lose a friend!

Don't Forget to Remember!

- Dave