Being Human

Cast:
* A young lady at one of my favorite establishments has a problem. She is inelegant in her communication.
* A fellow I know is so linear in his thinking that he cannot seem to form a direct sentence.
* A guy who manages one of my favorite watering holes is constantly indirectly offending people.
* My friend is hyper-focused on his goals, but when he explains them, his intensity presents negativity.
* Every time I ask a co-worker for something, he explains to me why it's not his fault.

Do you struggle to find the right things to say?
Do you have trouble articulating your point with out footnoting every thought?
Do you lean on catch phrases to transition thought?

The mastery of Communication is the most difficult Human characteristic. There is no such thing as communication expertise. Public Speaking, Negotiation, and Conflict Resolution are all points of emphasis in Communication courses. You have to walk before you can run.

We often fail in pursuit of Elegant Communication because we concentrate on all the wrong things. If you give great speeches, but cannot hold a conversation, you are putting the cart before the horse!

Let's start from the beginning by remember a few very simple Human Interaction techniques:
Eliminate A, Um, So, and Ya Know
Stop framing your language
Be direct
Honor Silence

Ummm, Ummm, Ummm
It's conference season where we will listen to hundreds of well-intentioned speakers. The content is what draws us in, the delivery is what redirects us to the exit.

I make a practice of counting ummms. I once saw a man tally 520 umms in a 45 minute speech. True Story! Ummm is a verbalized thought segue way. Between thoughts it is natural to grasp for a thought stop gap. Keep it to yourself.

You can replace ummm with a tap of your foot or a second of silence between thoughts. Ummmm's happen in meetings, on conference calls, in speeches, in interviews, and while you are trying to pick up chicks. No matter how good your content....if you ummm you destroy your credibility.

At the end of the day.....
Here are a collection of uninventive phrases that serve as lazy thought transitions:
At the end of the day
It is what it is
Throw me under the bus

These phrases are usually used by people who are well rehearsed in their language delivery.....and that's not always a good thing. People lose interest in these fast talking techniques because they convey that you are trying to establish credibility without earning it....and that's never a good thing.

Slow down your delivery, listen and treat every conversation as a unique entity. If you replicate the same mission statement to everyone you meet, you will be consistently cast away as inauthentic. Your conversation should be rooted in thought and unique to each individual you engage.

Think in Bullet Point
I know a guy who is of superior intelligence. He can program network continuity that can make any system simple to use. The programming process is extremely detailed. His inherent programming traits work on computers but not on people. His conversation starts with a point in mind and trails off into mundane detail. Programming is about exploring all possible conclusions, conversation is not. In communication you have to make a choice, make a point, and allow it to resonate.

Golden Silence
I was in a meeting with a Young Lady a few days back. She was determined to impress us. She did not stop talking the entire meeting. She did not allow us to ask questions, give feedback or interact. It was a one way street to 'not hired'.

There seems to be a human condition to fill space...a feeling that all silence is uncomfortable. In fact, many people like to digest information and think through their response before opening their mouth. Of course, no one likes a dead beat and sometimes you have to carry a conversation. But, you are far better served listening than talking...that's why God gave you two ears and one mouth.

Mastering Communication is an ongoing process. No one is a perfect communicator. If you start by focusing on the simple things on a small stage you can hone your skills and up your game when the chips are down.

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Desire Driven Work

This is the final installment of the Employee Purpose Perspective (EPP). We embarked on this journey together to find relevance between clock punches.


Today we ponder the final step to freedom:
Professional purpose is a willingness to fulfill personal desire



We have talked about engaging your team by making it personal, you have been sequestered to make your work a practice in passion. Yet, fulfilling personal desire through work is a seemingly absurd ideology.

What Does It Mean?

Desire is a drive within you that is of irreplaceable importance: that long term goal, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, your personal 'bucket list' objective. Assume you have made your employer happy, food is on the table, and your career path is secure.

What do you DESIRE?

Maybe it's the opportunity to start your own company, the idea of sailing around the world, or a 1967 cherry red Ford Mustang. You know you don't need any of these things, but when you have given all you can to those who matter, you will need something for yourself. Or will you?

What if every day you received your 'bucket list' rewards. What if right now you could embrace lifetime achievement. What is stopping you from having the life you want? Are you a slave to your lifestyle? Are you drown in expenses? Have you been trained to be afraid to take chances? Have you been following for so long that you forgot how to lead? Are you such a good employee that you have neglected to build your personal irreplaceable talent?

It's never too late to be everything you wish to be in life. It is never too early to start living life in the sunset.

It's not your job that matters, it's how you live your work. It's not your company's duty to inspire you...it is your duty to inspire yourself. Don't wait for instruction, CREATE your future...now.

The Employee Purpose Perspective is an Empowered Mission. I came upon it because I lived a life of misery for far too long. I was always uptight, I had a retort to every instruction, I was entitled, I was selfish, I gave advice without being asked, I offered my assistance only to elevate myself, I bitched and complained and made everyone around me miserable. I was not confident, I was afraid. I blamed my inefficiencies on others because I was too afraid to commit to greatness. I wasted the part of my life I should have most enjoyed...locked up in a self-created prison.

I don't want that to happen to you!

Be aware that we condition ourselves to follow the system. To do our work well in an effort to earn more work. Unfortunately, all roads lead only to a wall. We have been conditioned to turn around when we hit the wall and navigate the maze again.

TEAR DOWN THE WALLS!

The key to the EPP is to find a way over, around or through the wall. Very few will be willing to break out of their routine to help you get over the wall. You need to get creative in your thinking. To find new ways to do things. To realize that a wall...is really a door.

I leave you with 3 ideas to put DESIRE into your work:
Take Action
Find Outside Influence
Debrief

Act Now, Apologize Later
People want to hire people that they don't have to coddle. If your boss is always telling you how to do your job, you are more of a burden than an asset.

You will always be commended for taking initiative. YOU MUST, however, make sure you do not repeat the same mistake twice.

Barkeep...
Bartenders, Baristas and Valets make for great advisers. Don't ever underestimate anyone's advisory ability. Determine your audinece, present your challenges, and chew on it together.

Better to fumble through an idea with your Barber than your boss!

Action without strategy...
...is like swinging at shadows. You have to learn from each and every day. Develop the ability to debrief. Learn from your mistakes, bounce ideas off informal 3rd party advisers...and (most importantly) look deep into YOURSELF to find the answers.

Every day must be capped with a few minutes of silent reflection. Retrace what you have done, why you succeeded, and what you could have done better. Take what you have learned, make it part of tomorrow, and grow from it.

I don't write a blog to improve my resume or enhance my job prospects. This, I do, to help YOU. I don't want you to make the mistakes I have. I want you to recognize your worth and to stick up for yourself. The EPP is designed to help you find meaning in this life, not while you are on vacation, but while you are at work.

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

A Proposal of Personal Purpose

The world of business communication is evolving. More employees are working remote, more conference calls less office gatherings, and more webinars with less classroom training. There are those who say we have lost our human connection but ask yourself one simple question:


Where is the Revenue?

How much more productive have you become? It seems a little silly to admit we are so mistrusting of our employees that we require them to commute an hour in both directions and sit in a cage for 10 hours. This to ensure their work time is maximized. If you waste two hours driving and sit in a cubicle will you be more productive?

A company cannot determine personal purpose but they can use it to fuel their success:
* If you trust me to invest myself in the company vision I will determine my own prodution - and that's a good thing!

* To the contrary, if a 40 year old still has to be baby sat, he/she will do just enough to stay off the radar.

Don't you want your people On The Radar? Out in the open, in front of initiatives, excited to participate, engaged in the company culture...?

Yes, there certainly is such a thing as EMPLOYEE ENGAGEMENT. Call it what you will to avoid stigmatizing your company culture but if you create a company culture that mirrors personal purpose your company will double it's revenue.

Here's How:
Trust
Pay more for better people
Replace Performance Reviews with consistent dialogue
Say Thank You - every day
Create a Path that starts and ends where you are

A Big Boy Job
Maybe you love filling out spread sheets. Maybe you enjoy reporting, maybe your favorite thing is to defend your work to your boss. Or maybe you have had a series of jobs that have justified your employment through on-paper production. Anyone can count blips in a system and justify your effort. But, let's not confuse effort with results.

You may have gotten so used to taking a task list and checking boxes that you have lost your personal purpose. You need to find a way to give meaning to the numbers, categories and columns. If no one is challenging you to put you into your work, do it yourself.

An Inconsistent Environment
How can you keep winning if your team always turns over.
#Fact - It takes at least 6 months to train a new employee
#Fact - Time lost over six months costs your company dearly

Stop going the cheap labor route. Pay more for better people and avoid turnover. The incremental back filling is a default for a poor company culture due to terrible middle management.

Performance Review Suck!
There I said it...if you only have a dialogue with your employee once a year through a 1 - 5 job saving evaluation, you suck at managing people!

Believe it or not you can help people MAKE PROGRESS every day by examining their extended personal purpose in the organization. NO, you don't have to ask about TPS Report status but you can ask about their input regarding cost saving initiatives in their department.

Say Thank You!
Basketball Analogy: You can motivate by the bench or the basket. If every day I pull you aside and tell you if you screw up I will bench you - you will do just enough to stay in the game. If I empower you to score by instilling confidence in your ability, you will have the balls to take a last second shot.

THINK ABOUT IT!

Be Present
I used to think I wanted a promotion. It seemed that climbing the corporate ladder was a validation of my effort. That is an irrelevant measure of success.

Tell me WHY I am where I am today. Help me find my extended personal purpose in the organization. If you can do this I will work harder, stop asking for more money and stay focused on the task at hand.

In a floundering economy, one thing is always prevalent: OPPORTUNITY!

Most companies avoid opportunity by allowing perception and opinion to steer them toward the 'safe thing'. As an affect of this; poor management rules the nest, purpose is lost and employees can't wait for happy hour...A waste of money, a loss of production, countless opportunities ignored, a cog turning existence without personal purpose...A company that sucks the life out of people and drives them to the grave having gained nothing!

WAKE UP & MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

Help us find our purpose!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

The Ripple Effect - part 2

John assists Jennifer with an order and she sends him a friendly note along with a link to buy his favorite MP3. John's accomplishment is then broadcast to the company in a newsletter. He receives 22 emails from his colleagues extending further congratulations. He goes home happy for the weekend. So much so, that he asks his girlfriend to pick the movie tonight. She is so surprised and elated that she decides not to dump him.

Bill thinks the Sales guys get all the credit for his hard work; driving a truck picking up boxes of highly sensitive documents. After a long shift his boss asks him to come into the distribution office. He fires up his computer, asks him to read a heartfelt note from the guy with the tie and then tells him to select a piece of jewelry to give to his daughter to wear at the spring dance this weekend. Bill gives his daughter the necklace. She decides that her Dad is still the only guy for her and tells Travis that she will only be his dance partner that evening. Bill and his daughter spend a Sunday in the park like they used to. On Monday, Bill sees a full route on his itinerary and sprints to his truck to complete the orders on time.

Pauline has been passed over for a promotion for the 3rd time. Her job is effecting her marriage, she is always stressed and she really does not feel that all her hard work has had any impact. She walks into the office ready to quit and move to Nebraska with her husband. There, her whole team waits for her. Each tells her a brief story of how she has helped them. Pauline realizes that leadership is not about climbing the corporate ladder or making more money but the legacy you pass on to those who you touch every day.

Dear Reader,

This is the Ripple Effect! It is real. It makes companies better. It carries human interaction into the workplace and makes your office the best place to work in the world.

The Ripple Effect limits turnover, saves the company money, drives revenue, limits entitlement, and creates a community.

The Ripple Effect saves marriages, prevents teenage pregnancy and prohibits people from making wrong life decisions.

Your office is full of HUMAN BEINGS with Human Interest Stories. Celebrate Them!

THE RIPPLE EFFECT

How was work today?

The inevitable questions that is posed to us at day’s end when we are at the dinner table with our family, on the back porch with Grandpa, or in the gym with our friends is…how was work today?

The key to opening a positive dialogue in these ‘end of the day’ conversations is…The Ripple Effect.

The differentiating element in making any company great is our people…If we are celebrated we are inspired and if we are inspired we are engaged.

So if we spend most of our waking hours at work…and we love what we do…the world can be a better place!

BELIEVE!

Don't Forget to Remember,

Dave

references:

http://twitter.com/davidkovacovich