I remember my best pal and I sitting on our 7th Street couch in Tempe, Arizona. We witnessed Matthew McConaughey accept an MTV Movie Award. His speech was unforgettable because he was the first "adult" who went out of his way to express his pride in the youth. At a time in our lives when we were no longer kids but not yet adults, we appreciated that someone would be humble enough to congratulate others during his moment.
More recently, Matt spoke of the continuum of self-confidence. That one must consistently recreate themselves and seek only to keep up with self-appointed standards. Not a cop-out but a well thought out way to boldly address one's public.
Why is this important?
In each time I feel as though I've got it figured out...I get thrown for a loop. I act out of character, I let myself down, I take things too personally, I engage people who I should not, I do not put enough effort into engaging people who I should, and I mistreat the people who love me. Life is too short to waste precious hours yet I do. Over and over again.....
The great John Roderick had noted that his addiction was driven by his need to challenge himself. He would, essentially, build himself up to knock himself down... over and over again. Sometimes we create challenges that we know we can conquer to create false reassurance. When things seem perfect we mess them all up so we can rebuild the Lego's that make up our silly little castles.
We often point at others as the source of our misery when it is only ourselves who have created the mess.
Be Your Own Hero
Ole' Matt said his mother demanded that he respect himself and it allowed him to respect others. People will frown upon things like caring too much, acting with self assurance, and possibly trying too hard. Those who frown and cross arms do so because they do not possess the ability to assert themselves in the writing of their own life story. Yet, we try to win them over. Over and over again.....
In a Buddhist parable it is written that a man going through a tough spell went to see the Buddha. He laid out all the challenges he was facing. The Buddha told him that everyone faces 83 problems at any given time. He continued to say that the man was now facing 84 problems...the additional problem being that he was under the impression that his 83 problems were the fault of another.
Reward Your Critics
Let's say those who judge us do so because they see our greatness but are disappointed in our inability to see it in ourselves. It is difficult to stand up and try, it is harder to fail, but the worst we can do is to judge those who have tried and failed.
We can only win people over through our actions. If we surprise someone through our genuine intent we earn the ability to diffuse the stupid things we say.
Don't Forget to Remember!