Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Don't Lend Your Hand



In the midst of these fatiguing times, the above excerpt from a song written in 1974 entered my mind, the prose somehow timely.

When does the state of things wear upon us to the point of submission?

What would be the appropriate reaction:

To take action?

To drop out?

We need a clean slate, an avenue for thought that isn't lined by riflemen on both sides of the street.

 

Are Your Fists Up?
.... or are you raising your hands in forfeit?

What is worth fighting for and what is easier to ignore?


I know more than a few people who are bullies. They force their opinions upon others and dismiss counter-thought with a snide chuckle. They sit in the social media waiting room ready to attack those who haven't prepared to argue.

A strong-willed woman I know (and genuinely had come to dislike) engaged me in conversation the other day. She came home from another business trip ready to complain to her husband only to discover that he was gone.... for good. She explained a long note left on the table through which it was explained that her husband had grown tired of apologizing for her behavior. The house remained empty for a week. When her husband finally resurfaced, she wanted an explanation. His refrain ended with the divine truth that everything she put energy toward was in criticism of the effort of others. A tear came to her eye for a second before she darted to the coffee counter to yell at the Barista for fucking up her order.

Those fists in front of you are merely a shield.

The Head & The Heart
A young man who I've been coaching for half his life came up to me with his usual zeal. He's a good player who has already figured out that this silly game we are playing is not nearly as important as we pretend for it to be.

When the aforementioned young fella mentioned to be that he was nervous to face a pitcher from the other team, I had a recommendation for him:

This game is played from here (I pointed to his heart) not here (I pointed to his head).

He looked at me dissatisfied with the lack of defensive logic in my response but he accepted the sentiment.

It all comes down to what genuinely matters and how much time you spend pursuing it!

If you dislike your job, you are probably not a ton of fun to be around.

If you hate your boss, you probably spend your post-work time complaining.

Have you forgotten that the majority of your time should be spent doing things you enjoy?

You may not jump out of bed every day. There may be parts of your day that suck. You may even have entire days that don't go as planned. But, the majority of your time should be spent doing things you enjoy.

What do you believe in....? Pursue It!

Who do you love....? Spend More Time with Them!

Live where you want to live. Love who you want to love. Work where you want to work.

..... And Revel In The Moments In-Between!

Don't Forget to Remember,

Dave 

Monday, October 23, 2017

10 Years After


Today marks my 10th year in the human capital management industry. I was prepared to write a post about all the things done well and the opportunities missed, but you've read 500 such posts on this blog.

What does it really mean for a man nearing his mid 40's to have 2 decades of work experience?

I've never taken anything for granted. I've always appreciated my employer's willingness to write me a check every other week. I've also earned every penny I've ever made!

People are successful because: 
1. They work hard
2. They are creative
3. They understand how to design solutions to ever-evolving business problems

....I'd like to think I possess a combination of all these skills.

I've made hundreds of friends in the business world. To do right by the people who have helped me succeed is important to me. Results come and go, but the friendships you make are an awesome reminder of a skill that cannot be tracked or quantified:

The ability (in the midst of an ever-stressful workplace) to be a Good Person!

I never want to get to a point in my life where I no longer have something meaningful to contribute to my employer. When I finally hit the wall, I hope I'm not too proud to realize it. I've seen amazing young people leave great companies because no one helped them channel their youthful exuberance into professional excellence. I've seen heartless people produce results because they were willing to minimize the efforts of others to protect their own success.

I've seen people's career's ruined by their own selfishness. I believe in the long run nice guys/girls finish first. Integrity may not increase your commission check but it may be the VERY thing that gets you into heaven. He/she who dies with the most toys does not win.

I've always thought myself smart enough to talk business with any CEO. Most every CEO I've talked to just wanted to know about my kids and how I've been spending my free time (because they never have time for the little things). I hope I always have time for the little things!

I've been really fortunate to have worked for 4 great companies in 20 years. I've never felt as though I didn't have an opportunity to be successful.

I've had 3 bosses who I have disliked. Not because they were bad bosses but because they were bad people.

I've had 7 bosses who I have absolutely loved. They appreciated my hard work, helped me fix the things I sucked at, and always reminded me to celebrate my success.

Some people choose to manage instead of lead because they feel trusting relinquishes control.

I've had co-workers lose loved ones, get divorced or struggle to find true happiness. It is in these times that I'd like to think my employment has been valued more than ever.

If I was to tell my children what mattered most in business, it would probably be a combination of these things:

1. Nothing is more important than hard work.
2. Creativity is an irreplaceable skill set that is uncommon in business.
3. The same people you see on the way up, you will see on the way down.
4. Be Likeable!
5. Do your fighting in the ring.

Never Give Up!

Celebrate Everything!

Don't Forget to Remember,

Dave   

Monday, October 2, 2017

All The Little Pieces

The winter of our discontent is seemingly upon us. The news is bad, tragedy seems all around us, our country is in unrest.... people are divided.

It is in these times that people who do not pray, turn to prayer. When things get rough, people look for answers. When bad things are happening all around, some people hide out and others tie their boots on.

Beyond the broadcast, we deal with personal finance, professional challenges and the responsibility of family. The crippling world challenges are replicated in microcosm in our neighborhoods. There are good days and bad days. Each day brings it's fair share of challenges and a few subtle joys.

SO... WHAT SHALL WE DO?

 


I think myself a smart man. I'm not always brave or perfectly saintly, but I'd like to think that when people really need help, I can be someone to turn to. So, we take all the bad news and life challenges and we recall one undeniable truth....

AS LONG AS WE'RE STILL BREATHING, WE MIGHT AS WELL LIVE!

Time goes quickly, the future is uncertain and there are things that are beyond our control.

What we can control are the moments in-between.

There will be the grandiose life events: weddings, births, funerals, celebrations, sporting events, concerts and trips across the world.

The real living gets done in the park on a Tuesday. A simple evening walking to ice cream with your daughter. A meal with an old friend. That song you haven't heard since high school. A beer. A Burger. A kiss from your dog. A phone call from an old pal. An apology. Hearing, "I Love You". The glory of victory. The lessons learned through defeat. The smirk that comes upon your face when you are right. The embarrassment that washes over when you are wrong. A walk in the woods. A walk on the beach. Holding your sweet heart's hand. Holding your sweet heart's foot. A laugh. A Cry.

Before the impact of all the bad news was something you were unaware of, you probably spent a lot of time in the moments in-between.



Quit beating up on yourself. Don't blame others for your failures. Find somebody to love (and Love them well). Listen to The Grateful Dead (trust me on that one). Talk Less, Listen More. Take a drive for no reason. Leave your cell phone at home when you take a walk. Take a walk. Call your mom. Call your daughter. Write someone a note. Do a cross word puzzle. Forgive.... Forget.... Live!

There is no harm in thinking about God.

Kids are as smart as adults and far better conversationalist. Young people are not naive because they believe in a better place. Old people who have lives filled with hatred and regret can still be saved.

People who give parenting advice are usually not very good parents. People who are consumed by politics have nothing interesting to contribute so they memorize facts to help them win arguments. Sinners are more fun than false prophets.

I'd like to choose to believe there is a lot of time left to do a lot of great things. I'll choose to live as tough my time is limited.

Don't Forget to Remember,

Dave