Wednesday, June 10, 2009

A Note on Generational Diversity

Friends -
I have received a lot of flack at Bellingham Square Park this week from young bloggers. It appears my advice to High School & College graduates has crated a slanted demographic of readership.

Check Spelling
Tomorrow a collection of future leaders will be walking the sand box to receive hand written certificates of Preschool Graduation. The tunnel vision of my professional advising has caused me to overlook this group and their place in our societal development.

So it is with grad apology to all the shorties whose mom's are pressing their Baby Gap cap and gown that I offer this advice:
Words Speak Louder than Actions - you are in Kindergarten now...pooping your pants will lead to years of regret and embarrassment. People don't forget. Use your words, tell the teacher and hold it in.

Always Defend Yourself - It is never appropriate to start a fight but bullies become babies when you punch them back!

Sandwich First, Snacks Later - Pudding snacks pair much better with apple juice after having a full peanut butter sandwich on your pallet.

Homework Happy Hour - Sunset sessions at the park are way more funner when you've finished your ABC's. Decompress after school with your favorite cartoon but hit the books before the evening exercise.

Know Your Audience - When you make fun of kids the others are only laughing because you are making them uncomfortable. Be cool to hefty gents, they will be blocking for you in 8 years.

Always Tell Mom/Dad You Love Them - Craig Carmichael only told you that 'parents just don't understand' because he is a Will Smith junkie! Don't buy it....Mom and Dad have seen you naked many times and can ruin your reputation if the box wine is flowing at your next birthday party.

Bear in mind that I was held back in Kindergarten so I may not be the best source for advice at this age. Nonetheless, I chalk this up to a learning experience for us all. I promise to be mindful of age discrimination in future advice columns.

Go now onto the large playground of grade school and make your presence known!

- Dave

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