I headed into town for lunch in an empty barroom. I found the words of Anthony Bourdain & Jeff Tweedy. For a minute, time stood still and everyone was OK with one another.
It dawned on me that the frustration that bends my mind every day is self-imposed and that time spent arguing in a room with no doors only serves to divide us.
Little did he know, two seemingly insignificant moments would shape the rest of his life:
The most important moments of his life.... neglected
In the faint restaurant light, a man and his wife sat unreasonably close to my wife and I discussing the terms and conditions of their divorce. Their love had been reduced to a contract. The man spoke in personal terms at a level that everyone in a football field's distance could hear, fueled by four Manhattans and a lifetime of entitlement. He had one final chance to save his marriage and he was fucking up with galactic precision. My wife and I spoke not to one another out of embarrassment for people we did not know. He could have shown up and saved his family but he chose his ego over kindness (for the very person, of any person, that he should have appreciated most). There was no salvation in this story and I could hear his "wife" counting the seconds until she no longer had to endure this caveman's nonsense.
I will follow you into the dark
I've had the amazing privilege in life to work for people who have appreciated me. I was allowed to coach my daughter and her friends from the tender age of 2 onto their mid-elementary years. They used to really like me and now they're too-cool-for-school. But, that's OK. Our fleeting time together helped form their mentality, they will be more successful for it.
On an evening when her older brother and Mom were away, my 10 year daughter dropped her shield. No phone... no friends to stand behind... Halloween candy securely tucked away. The little butthole decided to spend a few minutes with her dad. After enjoying a few episodes of Uncle Halsted's program, we headed to bed. She waited by my side to brave the dark and for a minute she was a kid again.
What a privilege........
BIG events will come and go:
Your kids might get married or go to jail.
Your team might win a championship or win not a single game.
You might choose to be miserable in a room full of love.
You might stop trying.
Or.... Maybe..... at the moment when you are called upon to save all that is important to you.... you'll sit in the seat of the person next to you and stop embarrassing those who chose to love you.
It seemed in the course of a single day the winter had arrived in the East Coast. I jumped in a cab. I was on my way home......
Don't Forget to Remember,