There Goes My Hero

I spent a good portion of my youth in Mission Viejo, California. It's a great little Orange County nugget, a 20 minute a bus ride from California's golden shore. Like most 5th grade kids, I spent the sunny California afternoons playing sports: skateboarding, baseball, hoop and football. I had a lot of loyal friends, our kinship was strong. Our greatest bonding experiences were pick up games against the kids from the other side of town. There was a pride in our neighborhood and sports were our vessel.

So, you can image our excitement when the great Todd Marinovich left Mater Dei and came to Capo Valley High School. There was a massive national back story to Todd, he was known as robo-QB. My friends and I didn't really read Sports Illustrated but watching Todd Marinovich play made us proud of our hood. We loved watching him play! During games we would walk to the other bleachers to challenge the kids from the other side of town to tackle football games. We represented our big brothers and sisters and Todd Marinovich was our leader. He inspired us to be better.

As time passed, the media came to understand what we knew: Robo-QB was a kid like everyone else. It didn't offend my friends and I, but the rest of the world was furious. Todd wasn't perfect. People get mad when their manufactured heroes turn out to be human.

More than training or fundamental football knowledge, Todd Marinovich had a massive competitive spirit. He was an awesome basketball player, he fought the super-sized Food Nelson on the Viejo Elementary playground, he showed young people like myself to have pride in our effort. His crowning moment came after a game winning touchdown pass. An opposing team member offered to help him up after knocking him down. Todd offered him a middle finger. He had friends to lift him up, as did I. It made sense to everyone who followed his leadership!

Then we all grew up. We continued to play sports with the intensity that we learned from Todd Marinovich. After an improbable Rose Bowl win, it felt as if he had given us everything we needed. We were now ready to carry the torch. I saw Todd at my sister's wedding years later and said hello. I told him I liked his music. That was the extent of our conversation. I had hoped he might appreciate the fact that I didn't ask him to sign my tuxedo.

With great power comes great responsibility.

Is it realistic to think that a teenage sportsman should be a role model? Should not one be judged for how they play the game not what they do off the field. There are those who hold their heroes on a pedestal (and when they fail, they die inside). Others find their heroes in the hallways of their own home and forgive athletes when they lose a game. Football is just a game that happens in 60 minutes. The game of life does not have a clock and the goal lines are often cloudy in the distance.

I was really happy to see the Great Todd Marinovich was given an opportunity to tell his story on ESPN last night. Todd did not blame his Dad for an upbringing destined to unfair expectations. He didn't make excuses for falling from grace. He advocated youth sports and it's essential contribution to his human character.

As leaves turn and waves roll in, time becomes the ultimate judge of character. We grow stronger through our experiences, we learn to forgive, we forget heartbreak and we discover that challenges exist on and off the field. As my son races through the California sun with a football under his arm, I am thankful to Todd Marinovich for teaching me how to play the game.

"There goes my Hero....he's ordinary" - Dave Grohl

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave        

The Crime of Emotion

Much has been made of the post game spat between two football coaches this last weekend. Jim Schwartz felt disrespected because Jim Harbaugh shook his hand with too much force after the game. I am from Michigan and I hate the 49ers, so it would be my natural inclination to side with Coach Schwartz - not in this case.

The term sportsmanship is like the omni-present company Core Value of Integrity. Both are high and mighty terms that govern behavior to the most gradiose court. As if to say it is esstential to consider the tradition of the sport/business when any decision is made or action takes place. Give Me a Break!

Jim Schwartz was not upset because the integrity of the coaching hierarchy was corrupted - he was upset because he lost. It may not have been in good taste for Coach Harbaugh to jump up and down like a school girl when he won - but can you blame him for his inability to hide his excitement? Both guys are in leadership positions on team's that used to suck and are now good. These teams are good because their leaders have asked more of their teams and have proven they were willing to put the work in with them. Proving the old addage that hard work pays off!

It's pretty simple: You Should Be Humble in Victory and Accountable in Defeat

Today talk radio shows will have jammed phones occupied by people who never played football eager to weigh in with their opinion of the coaches confrontation. Beyond the actions of these individuals in this particular post-game fracas, there are lessons in
personal integrity to ponder:
1. Celebration Is Not An Act of Disrespect!
2. Losing is an Unfotunate Part of Life!
3. Own Your Actions!

Get Some
I coach a soccer team of 6 year olds - we are very good! When I see these young people take what is being taught and apply it, my purpose on this earth is further validated. Am I a jerk for celebrating the achievement of these wonderful little people? Is it bad that I can't help throwing my hands up in encouragement for my place in this world and the legacy I have been lucky enough to be part of? Other coaches will occasionally look over at me with disappointment - they are disappointed that they are losing.

It is not arrogant to celebrate....it is an acknowledgement of our human existence. When the emotion turns off, your life is put on pause. Don't be afraid to celebrate because the other guy doesn't have what you earned!

Losing Sucks
No person has ever won every competition they ever entered. Even The Great Cael Sanderson must have come up short in a spelling bee somewhere along the line. It is bitterly unfortunate, but losing is part of life. I love nothing more than winning, but I have learned a great deal more from my losses. In order to elevate yourself as a person and a professional, you have to try things that may be beyond your perceived skill set. When you bump yourself up a level you stand to lose. Better to get on the elevator than to stay on the first floor.

If you are willing to try everything you stand to learn a lot. If you wish to try nothing at the risk of failure you may never lose....or learn anything.

Accountability
...another ominous core value...this one slightly more applicable.

The aforementioned coaches eventually owned their actions stating that they got caught up in the competitive moment. I am always disappointed when a public figure cannot be honest in light of their actions. If Tiger Woods held a press conference admitting that he lived his life in a bubble and lost control of his discipline when his father died, do you think he would have been more easily forgiven? The hardest thing to do is own your actions. There is hope to benefit from in unfortunate results if you can simply admit you are not perfect. It's also the right thing to do!

When the game is over you might see the other coach at the grocery store, on the playground or at church. Will you be looked upon favorably when no one else is watching? If you lose a deal and are graceful in defeat, that prospect will leave their door open for you. If someone betrays your trust, and you give them another chance, you allow them an opportunity to benefit from a loss.

Let's save accountability and integrity for tax season and the jury at the pearly gates. Until then, just try to do the right thing!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

A Farewell to Summer

I woke at my usual time early this morning into complete darkness. One thing now sure:
Summer is Gone

The blistering sun soon to snuggle into the clouds, swimsuits to find the bottom drawer, jackets dusted off, the leaves soon to say goodbye their branches. It's time for the Fall: Less hours of sunlight, cold nights, rainy days and nothing else to do but concentrate on work.

Without long evenings, with no one on Embarcadero sun decks, without a soul on the beach...It is time to look to the finish line, set goals and complete another successful year.

With the last glimpses of sunshine hung up in the labor day weekend we can only move forward with strategic intent. Say goodbye to summer, it's time to buckle down.

May I propose the following for the final third of 2010:
* There is no high greater than the thrill of victory
* Choose Your Pain
* What's Your Movie Look Like?

Winning
The one place where being last matters most is the company parking lot. As the sun leaves, I propose long hours at the office to make up for lost time. Wandering down the beach with a beer in hand is great...wandering into Santa's workshop with a wallet full of money is better.

There are those of us who sighed deeply as traffic and impending responsibility swallowed us up this morning. It is hard to let go of fun in the sun...but, it is time to keep your sunny memories in your mind and bust out the sport coat. Longing for the beach will not be an option if you are unemployed. Time to think about paying the rent.

"There are two pains in life: The pain of Discipline and the pain of Regret"
- Russ Hellickson

This quote used to haunt me in High School as it was the motto of our wrestling team. There is no escaping it; there are things that need to be done and you cannot pretend otherwise. Your responsibilities will not go away and the winter wine tastes better on the wings of productive business progress.

A Comedy or a Tragedy?
What does your movie look like? We are all aspiring movie stars. So as the cold air hits us, be it not in dramatic fashion. Nay, today we trudge forward not for ourselves but for our wives, children, country and the good lord. For they cannot carry themselves with confidence if we do not set a course for them. Shovel the driveway, scrape the windshield and brave the snow laden roads.

It is football season, the baseball playoffs are afoot, Halloween is approaching then Turkey Day and before we know it Christmas will be here.

Be A Hero. Do That Which Seems Unfun. Brave the Fall and then the Winter. The sun will be back before too long.

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave