Caring

With the NBA season coming to a conclusion we revisit the legands of the past:

• The great Larry Bird said he had only cried twice in his life, once when he lost the NCAA championship and once when losing an NBA championship...both times he lost to Ervin Johnson.
• Michael Jordan said that he loved the thrill of winning a championship so much that he dedicated himself to winning as many as he could.
• Billy Beane (Oakland A's GM) admitted that he hated losing even more than he enjoyed winning.
• ...and now Lebron James has finally fulfilled expectations. 

Of the above mentioned only one of them had it right. Let's explore why:

Great Expectations
The Great Cathy Berky recently shared an act of vulnerability in our LinkedIn group. She noted that her expectations of herself had always been exceedingly high (which is what makes her great).
She followed up by saying that she had found peace by allowing curosity to lead.

I wonder if Larry Bird loved basketball as much as we all think he did? He was a pure shooter and a fierce competitior, equal parts artist and warrior. The questions lies in why he cared so much? Did he want to win more than anything in the world or was he terrified of losing?

That's what losing sounds like...
The Great Billy Beane was quoted as saying that he hated losing more than he enjoyed winning. That sense of motivation built a fire in him that put him in a position to become the best paid in his profession. The true joy comes in winning and if you win only to keep from losing, you neglect your ability to celebrate.

To prepare and best an opponent seemingly stronger and more qualified than you is the ulitmate feeling of success. You don't prepare and try hard because you want to see the Giant cry. You win to prove to yourself that you can do anything and that nothing is impossible in this sad and beautiful world.

It's about freaking time!
Lebron James, the greatest basketball player of our time, has finally won a championship. Always big for his age and blessed with extraordinary athletic ability, Lebron James became a fan favorite by the time he finished high school.

Then something happened....

The expectation of greatness bestowed upon Lebron James did not manifest itself quickly enough. In this quick fix society, we want results....right away. So Lebron's love for Basketball turned into a job. He stopped running around with joy in his heart and started over-thinking the process of winning. He lost the joy and laced up the shoes with an assumed obligation to fulfill public expectations. When he hoisted the championship trophy on Thursday night, the thrill of being the best was replaced by the relief of achieving what everyone knew he was capable of.

...the real answer
My Dad once told me never to make a decision based on money. I replied that he had money. To which he retorted, "that's because I never made a decision based on money". My Dad knew what Tony Hsieh later explained:
If you lead with a purpose for which you have a passion, the profits will come naturally.

Think of it this way...
would you rather win a championship with your truest friends by your side or move across town just to play on a better team with a bunch of strangers?

Our motivation cannot be defined by what we think to be the right way, but by what we believe we were put on this earth to do.

Do you remember the show The Wonder Years? Kevin's dad would come home angry every day and proclaim "work is work". Do you ever feel like Kevin's dad? That the work you do is lacking purpose? That the passion is gone? That you are just in it for a paycheck?

It's not 1950 anymore! You are now more empowered as an employee than Kevin's dad ever was. In fact, you don't have to put up with losing anymore!

You are in control!

To put effort into something so as to avoid losing defeats the purpose of living. To win your way, by your rules, is the most empowering thing in life. If you allow others to make the rules, your chances of losing increase. To play another person's game and to win serves to validate your worth. Love is created by flipping the rules on their ear, finding a better way, and proving that it works better.

Your greatness is defined by the JOY you find in winning, not the relief of doing enough to keep from losing!

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave

Clusters

In building his organizational mission, Tony Hsieh was wise enough to ask all his employees one question...Why? He evolved Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs into the Happiness model. The questions Tony asked of those he interviewed got to the core of what they really wanted. He believed one's professional goals, aspirations for personal entertainment, and mission to serve those they loved were central to one purpose...

To Be Happy!

In his book, Start With Why, Simon Sinek introduced the golden circle. The general premise, "people don't buy what you do they buy why you do it". You may have a great product...it may help people toggle their social platforms more effectively, but WHY are you in business? What is the center of your circle?

What is YOUR WHY?

You exist in a Cluster.....your work, family and hobbies are interconnected by one thing: YOUR WHY

In order to find synergy among the seemingly unrelated things that make up your cluster, you have to find your WHY. These are the elements of your life....the petals to your flower....Your WHY is at the center of it all.

Are You Present in the Moments In-Between?
We work hard to develop opportunities to experience happiness. We are in search of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. We put in long hours to afford family vacations, a gift for the wife, and/or the newest gadget for the kids.....none of it matters! We find happiness not in the things we pursue but in the things that remind us to stop chasing what is not there. Moments in the park on a Tuesday afternoon bring us greater meaning than the sweet 16 party that cost us half of our bonus. To recognize and to be present in the moments in-between is the true path to discovering what is genuinely important.

You might sell a data management tool (that is the 'what'). You may have an uncanny knack for developing efficient and cost effective data management processes for your clients (that is the 'how'). Your mission for being in business is your WHY. It's not about the products you make or how you bring them to market. It's your purpose on this earth and how it relates to your business persona that matters most.

If your purpose is clearly defined and you are passionate about your mission; profits come naturally. If you are passionate in your purpose you need not force solutions where they do not exist or to act out of character. If you are engaged in what you do you can connect humans instead of grinding numbers.

Find Your Tribe
Align yourself with your boss - the person for whom you work wants you to succeed! If it seems otherwise, look in the mirror. Are you being forced to do something you wish not to do or are you making it difficult for your leader to lead? Hiding from your professional superior will not make him/her go away. Develop a plan that will help you mutually succeed and devote yourself to it. Communication built on trust drives high level relationships. If you fail without asking for help you cut your safety net.

Connect with your support staff - there are people in other departments with whom you will need to work. The people with whom you work may be less intelligent than you, they may not work as hard as you do and they may be less motivated than you are.....that is not an excuse to berate them. Instead of passing tasks and asking for accountability, you should empower and help others find purpose in what they do. At the very least - always say please and thank you!

3 Friends - find 3 friends at work. These need not be people in your department or division. Consult third party observers with whom you can share your professional experiences and gain insight. A variety of viewpoints helps you form a grander perspective. Without a formalized relationship in place people are more forthcoming and candid in their advice.

What are the Metrics of the Space Between?
How much is your free time worth?

We often devalue ourselves by allowing the things we do not want to do to drain our focus and energy. We neglect to imagine that the most important time is not spent on the clock but off it. Your most profound inspiration will happen not within your cubicle but on a path in the park.

How are you spending your free time?

You must choose between what you want to do and what you have to do (and prioritize accordingly). Stress is a result of inelegant goal setting. If you are only driven by the mandatory directives of others, you will never be happy. The discovery of what is important to you comes from making time to escape your professional structure. Break the mold and elevate your mind. Put your energy into what you want to do. Find inspiration in every task by relating it to your WHY.

Sunset....
:) Success is the discovery of happiness.
:) Your WHY is your true mission - it should be at the center of every decision you make.
:) The moments in-between are far more important than grandiose events.
:) Developing multi-tiered relationships will give you a more fully formed workplace perspective.
:) Your free time is as important to your success as your time on the clock.

Homework: Develop a cluster that relates the subjects above. Prioritize your time/energy toward what is genuinely important. Identify your WHY and remind yourself of it every day.

Don't Forget to Remember!

Dave